World War Three

Fox News Was On. However I was completely oblivious of this fact because I was showering in the upstairs bathroom. I enjoyed this privilege whenever I came over from Germany & visited my "American grandparents". Later on in life while inhabiting their basement I would dream about the upstairs bathroom as I named the silverfish I shared the basement bathroom with...

After finishing my shower I proceeded crossing the hallway wrapped in my towel & sporting a turban, when out of nowhere my grandpa crashed into me carrying a huge rifle which he was in the process of loading. It was only obvious to me that WWIII had ensued without my knowledge.

I froze in horror & watched my grandpa "run" (it's more of a forward falling motion of the upper body & his feet simply following as a result of gravity) towards the front door.

20 seconds later I was torn out of my frozen state of shock by multiple shots being fired.

As I ran towards the front door, what I figured to now be a crime scene I wondered why the hell somebody decided to invade America exactly when I was visiting the county. Just my luck to be raped & killed by some angry Canadians on my American vacation!!

Upon reaching the front door & thus the front porch I saw that WWIII had indeed not chosen it's battleground in my grandparents' front yard. Instead my grandfather had unleashed all hell on a chipmunk that was stealing from my grandmothers' precious birdfeeders and had blasted it to mere smithereens.

He then casually trotted past me back into the house to finish his interrupted breakfast where as always Fox News Was On.